Feelings: part one..depression causes and care

Feelings. Everyone has them. You, your mother, your neighbor down the street, even that criminal who stole rs50,000 from u. But what are feelings? How do we associate them to our lifestyle? Why are they so important? Many of us have felt a combination of the most common feelings. We have been angry, sad, frustrated. We have been depressed, worried  too often, had unexplained and uncontrolled fears. We have hated ourselves a time or too, and hated the person who ran us off the road because they were in a hurry to get to some place. The fact is, feelings are not going to go away on their own. Feelings are extremely important to our self-being,  and  without them we might as well consider ourselves robots. Feelings are produced by chemicals in the brain which in turn can cause us to feel various emotions. However, what most people don’t come to realize is that certain factors attribute to these feelings.
For the time being lets stick to our main topic Depression
 People with clinical depression are often misunderstood by friends and family, especially when it appears that  things are going well in their lives. No one understands why this person is depressed or sad. The advice ,if anyone  cares to give, given to them is: Cheer up! Just smile! Don’t let it get to you!you deserve a better life! wait for something good to happen!  So stop for a moment and think about this.
Diabetes is a disease that is caused by a problem with the pancreas, having to do with a hormone called insulin. There are many different causes for diabetes, including poor lifestyle choices, poor eating habits, poor physical and emotional health, a family history (genetics) of the disease, etc. Some people are more prone to it than others. Some people, when faced with identical circumstances, will never get diabetes, and some who do everything right  will.
If someone has diabetes, would you tell them to cheer up and get over it? No, you would most likely tell them to go to the doctor, and if need be, change their lifestyle, eating habits, sleep habits, and perhaps in extreme cases, to  take medication. But still those friends need special thanks as nothing comforts as much as feeling of being cared.
Depression is nothing of which to be ashamed. It is partially controllable, but not completely. Learning to change lifestyles and attempting to keep negative influences out of your life can indeed help where depression is  concerned, but it cannot prevent bouts of depression flare ups, just like other cyclical medical disorders can flare and go into remission. Depression can go into remission of sorts, where someone who suffers from depression can have depression free moments, ranging from a few days, to weeks or even months before another episode flares.
Now, try if you can, to picture feelings like that every single day of your life, day in and day out. Think about  what it must be like when nothing makes you happy, nothing makes you smile, nothing brings you pleasure…nothing  goes the way you expected  it to be  and then extend that out to where you feel that way for months and months, and try  to picture how you u’d feel emotionally, physically, mentally. Considering  this  happens with someone for long enough time , wouldn’t  he be like what people call depressed or mentally ill.
Question here is not regarding what terminology should be used, but what are our responsibilities for them? Should we keeep on reminding them of their mental condition..friends  i assure u one thing that this is going to make  them fall under depressed category clinically even if they are not or are recovering from the condition. It’s very easy to hurt someone specially those who have shared something with you.bt should you? Isn’t it going  to  break social contract of confidentiality inherent in friendship.
Some people enjoy making fun of others, they are more than happy in embarrassing  someone which in extreme cases  can  bring  tears. Most of the people call it sense of humor or fun stuff. But is it?  you are getting  happiness by making someone sad. Do u know y because u don’t have ability to find ur happiness in  someone  elses. Friends your real sense of humor will be tested when u need to make a weeping person laugh, a sad person happy  and bring someone out of depressed mood.
Try someday feeding some hungry people, serving water to a thirsty one, wiping tears of someone with your palms,  holding someone’s arms and holding someone in your arms when  needed .Try sacrificing your happiness for others. I can give it in written ,that day you will be more satisfied than ever. You will feel more self-esteemed than any  day in your life specially those when you enjoyed making fun of others, when you didn’t care about someone’s suffering after hurting him. Do you know why? Its simply because you  are  human and humane inside you will tell you “thank you dear for keeping me alive within you”.
I will keep on feeding humane inside you  with my blogs , although i don’t need to but i will…stay tuned

Possessiveness---a relationship-wrecker

Love cannot be found where it doesn't exist, nor can it be hidden where it truly does.This one line in itself contains everything i am going to discuss with unstinting devotion and unreserved enthusiasm in my first blog and few subsequent blogs.

I have already spoiled your very precious 1 minute , so lets directly fly to our main topic.What is possessiveness?..Dictionary/general meaning: a feeling pertaining to ownership or possession.So can someone  or should someone show possessiveness over something which is not his property or over something which is his property.Whatever your opinion is, its true for things.

What about persons? ask yourself can a person.. parent, wife or husband has ownership or possession over another person.I agree with you, he hasn't.So where in the hell this word Possessiveness exists for people.The truth is friends, it does and does even when you don't possess someone because there is and has always been a difference in the way you think and feel about the things you love and about the people you love.So should we conclude that possessiveness is related to love.Hold on a second you might be right but we should not jump to any conclusion until we touch the last full-stop(.)Possessiveness can result from lack of faith,absence of direct and transparent communication, scarcity of self-confidence and abundance of care or from all of them.It is also jealously opposed to any influence other than one's own.Its little confusing, how and more importantly why Possessiveness is due to lack of faith or abundance of care.Let me simplify, its driven due to fear to loose someone or something you consider very vital for yourself.

Now when we have understood the meaning of Possessiveness we are  qualified to distinguish Possessiveness from other feelings and to decide whether it should be allowed to be a relationship-wrecker.

It goes without saying that "the more precious stone is in your hand, the more tightly you close your fist". Because if this precious thing is not your part it can't bind itself to you,and when you don't want to loose it the only option you are left with is to close your fist in a way so that it would not fall and would not be damaged as well.Is this an easy task..hell no, chances of safe-landings are rare.So only life-saver is a healthy common understanding.
When you go out with your friends say on some hill,your parents tell you not to go near ditches,do they say this because they think you are going to jump into valley, they just care for you.When you have just learned riding a bike and you go somewhere you are advised to cross the roads carefully, do they mean to say that you don't know how to cross the road?

People fence their house to protect it from encroachment because house can't protect itself.Had house known whom to allow and whom not to,who is going to make a temple in it and who is going to make it a brothel(a center of prostitution), there has not been any need of fencing.What house want is decorations,visitors,thrill,manic..irrespective of the purpose.House is not sensible enough to understand someone's feeling but what about us? We should ask this question to ourselves that should we spoil our precious relationship due to these small things.Finally its your cup of tea.....r.k.r